Cafe de Mello

I have been good. I have been nice. I have refrained from speculating on what sort of mental disorder could account for the devotion of some middle-income voters to John McCain. But I have had it with Joe Numbnuts Wurzelbacher and his ilk (too bad it's ilk and not elk; doubtless Palin shoots elk).

Not only is Joe voting against his economic self-interest (Barack Obama's tax plan will save Joe money on what he actually earns as opposed to what he earns in his rich fantasy life), but Joe seems to have no other cogent reason for voting for McCain.

I could tolerate this display of self-righteous stupidity but I have reached my breaking point. I passed it while watching a video of Joe Numbnuts talking with another McCain supporter who claimed that electing Obama would be "death to Israel." Numbnuts visibly thought about this for a second or two then agreed, obviously without any real reason.

When asked to explain this conclusion by Shepard Smith at Fox News, Joe Numbnuts would not retract this charge even though he was unable to supply a single reason for this conclusion.

This is how we get Numbnuts who still believe Barack Obama is a Muslim, who are concerned about his relationship to Bill Ayers, and who are devotes of Sarah Palin-through magical thinking. Whatever they believe must be right!

So let me practice this magical thinking for a minute. Joe Numbnuts the Plumber is showing brain damage. Since he is unlicensed and doesn't know what he is doing, Joe clears clogged drains by putting his mouth over the drain opening and sucking real, real hard. The suction he creates causes his head to contract, which is why he has no hair, and swallowing the clogs when they come up has interfered with his digestion, leading to malnutrition. His brains have been alternately squeezed and starved until they no longer function normally.

There, I have said it; and by Joe Numbnuts' rules, it must be true. Now Joe, here is a yoyo with no string so you can't hurt yourself. Get off the stage, and go play quietly in a corner.

And McCain, if this numbnuts is, as you have claimed, "your role model" who you plan to take with you to Washington, why would anyone let you within shouting distance of the presidency?

Christ raised the dead, healed lepers, cripples, the blind and the deaf, but even he didn't try to fix stupid, and McCain's elevation of Joe Numbnuts the Plumber is stupid beyond all hope of redemption.